Dear Charleston…

Ravenel Bridge, Charleston, SC

Dear Charleston,

Thank you for teaching me how to drive like a maniac drive in the city traffic.  Seattle drivers and traffic have nothing on you.

Just this afternoon while I was driving my husband to the airport, we saw a whole mess of traffic that I knew I would be driving into the midst of on my way home.  A little less than a year ago and this thought would have scared the bgeezus out of me, but not anymore!  I have faced the Devil himself when it comes to driving with the crazies!

Well, maybe that is an exaggeration, but close enough since you, The Holy City, have some of the worst drivers I have ever seen.  I may come from a little town, on a little island, in a large state that has some very strict cops, but I do know crazy when I see it.  Yes, there was some culture shock when I traveled to the South and found out that the rules of the road are quite different than in the hoity toity Pacific North West, but that was quickly overcome for the need of survival!  Survival of the fittest, indeed!

But I digress.  Charleston, I would like to thank you for teaching me to be a more gutsy driver when it comes to multiple lanes of traffic, for teaching me it is okay to use my horn on people if they have not moved after three seconds at a green light, and for letting me know that my car can indeed fit in that space if I will it!

Only today in the midst of a huge cluster of traffic did I say (whilst using my bluetooth handsfree device!), “I don’t have any room [to get over into the other lane]!”  When my darling husband replied, “Then you have learned nothing in Charleston!”  Upon hearing this I promptly urged my huge metal beast (my little truck) into the gap in the traffic next to me.  I received no less than one honk!  Upon successfully merging into the moving lane of traffic and receiving what I assume was an indignant or irate honk, I gave myself a congratulatory pat on the back and went back to navigating my metal steed through very heavy traffic.

Once again, dearest Charleston, I thank thee for teaching me the city ways.  I hope to once again grace your streets with my fast car and tiny truck, but for now I must stay here in this place devoid of any nasty disgusting horrifying Palmetto bugs which you seem so abundantly endowed with, for a place that has trees so thick, tall and green that they choke out all radio station signals.

My fondest regards,

Me, the new and “improved” driver






NOTE:  I mean no offense to my Chucktown friends, I am sure that they drive like normal people.  I mean all the other crazy people out there are the bad drivers!


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